26 August 2010

Positive, Thankful, and Over It

The past seven days have been interesting. I wasn't exactly prepared to have my HIV status broadcast all over the internet but I was pleasantly surprised by the flood of support I received. From The Advocate to Gay Russia, it seemed like everyone wanted to talk about it. By now I'm sure the story has been discussed so much that most of you are sick of reading about it, but I have a few final things to say on the subject matter before I move on.

First, I would like to say that I was depressed (for a short while) NOT surprised that I had contracted HIV. I am solely responsible for my health. I was well aware of the risks and dangers associated with bareback sex but I ignored them. Is that stupid of me? I suppose. Do I wish I had been safer? Of course. But there is no changing the past, I can only hope that I make smarter decisions in my future.

Second, I would like to send out a special thank you to all of the people in the gay porn industry who showed me kindness and gave me support. I was touched to know that so many of you cared. Especially Zachary Sire from TheSword.com, Jason Sechrest of JasonCurious.com, and Jasun Mark of GayDailyHot.com. The three of you are the best. I'm lucky as fuck to have y'all on my side. Seriously. LUCKY AS FUCK. I'd like to thank The Advocate for taking the time to interview me and POZ blogs for writing about me in a positive light. And I have to thank Steven over at QueerClick for getting me that interview with The Advocate. I am grateful to Chris Ward for publicly offering me a job(and boosting my ego), Treasure Island Media for also offering me a job, and my Boss at Next Door Studios, Stephan Sirard, for publicly offering to renew my contract.

Finally, I don't need someone to talk to, I need someone to fuck me!... I mean THANK YOU. Thank you to all of my readers, supporters, and fans. Your positive comments and words of encouragement mean a lot to me. I totally don't deserve you, your attention, or your admiration. But I'll take whatever y'all give me.

Now can I please get off of this damn hospital bed/burning at the stake and resume my sexually deviant ways?

52 comments:

  1. personally I still think your hot and would not turn down the chance to fuck your brains out, that being said I do not think that being positive is the end of the world and should not be the end of your career as a slut. I personally think it is something that you are quite good at and it is hot to watch. futhermore I think that your "deviant behavior" is not really that different than most guys out there. You just have the balls to say it and they don't.

    Just play smart and you will be fine.

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  2. I love the title of this post. Should have just kept it at that and I would have known exactly what you meant! I'm really looking forward to seeing what is coming up next with you! ^_^ keep us updated as much as you can and don't go on another 3 month drought. I mean, I understand now why you did, but it was torture not hearing from you!! Much love!!!

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  3. It's time to fly to Eastern Europe, Mason! Turn back on the "open sign" for your hole! "No rubbermaid allowed"...

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  4. Im happy that you are happy. Im gay but have never actually done anything about it (except for an intense, anonymous handjob in a local college bathroom). Sex must be addictive because you still want more. In the words of Whitney Houston, "Crack is whack" lol. Good luck in the future, I love your website, videos and you.

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  5. I wish you the best and I hope you live well and happy. Shit happens, but it's important to keep on living. Winners are not those who never make a mistake, but those who make mistakes and learn from them and get back up.
    I send you much love! And if you wanna hear about some alternative medicine that really helped a friend of mine who was full blown AIDS and now is totally undetectable and healthy, please write me an email, I would love to help you out *hugs*

    agnello.dei@gmail.com

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  6. Ok is it me or did I just get some major wood from reading your last post? Shit I would love to bend you over and pump you full of my toxic cream and know that you are really enjoying it all...so deep and filling...LOL

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  7. Really milking this aren't you?

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  8. "I totally don't deserve you, your attention, or your admiration."

    But you do. You have more moral and intellectual integrity, courage and strength in your fingertip than those miserable holier-than-thou haters can hope to gather in entire lifetime - in spite of all the posturing and screaming of the opposite

    "Finally, I don't need someone to talk to, I need someone to fuck me!"

    "Now can I please get off of this damn hospital bed/buring at the stake and resume my sexually deviant ways?"

    Ha ha! :D Now this is the Mason Wyler we know and love! You are my hero, always!

    xoxoxo,

    Lotta

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  9. Your attitude is a good one. I say that because it mirrored my own response in the middle 90s. When my doctor told me, I teared up; however, that was the only time. When I told friends and relatives, I did so matter-of-factly. Some seemed to think it was a Greek tragedy. I just incorporated the knowledge into my daily existence, have my check-ups every three months, and often go days without thinking much about it. I take my pills much the same way I get my morning coffee or brush my teeth before bed. It is there. There have been consequences here and there, but nothing unmanageable.

    An acquaintance was diagnosed a few years after me. He just obsessed with it for two years, then put a bullet through his head. I don't understand that. Like you, I also continued to have sex a lot. The bug-chasers were a bit annoying, but I just sent them on their way. I use condoms on request only and never bareback unless the other party is aware of their risk.

    Some people think it is horrible that I still have sex, but I don't fuck them anyway. An informed partner has a responsibility to make their own choices. No hard feelings from me if the opt out. I know who infected me, but don't blame him. I made the choice without being coerced. He was a nasty fucker, and the sex was always outstanding.

    Just go to a doctor for regular check-ups, get all your vaccinations including those for hepatitis, and get an annual flu shot. My quite handsome, gay doctor is very experienced with HIV treatment and if he wasn't in a monogamous relationship, I would love to hook up with him. Good luck in the future. I always enjoy your work as sexy, fun, and a little nasty (in the best way possible).

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  10. great news

    now we will see you barebaking

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  11. Damn right. Get back out there so I have more porn to buy. Please keep on being yourself.

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  12. I vote for Treasure Island. They'll bring out the pig in you and get you fucked really, really well.

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  13. Please don't go to TIM, the guys are disgusting, queeny and quite scary looking/acting! You need to go with a twink studio as another responder said in Europe.:)

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  14. Absolutely :)

    And Mason.....

    I would love to profile you on my blog.

    I have profiled Jasun and Sean Storm and think you would fit in just fine.

    OH - and the poz stuff does not need to be part of the interview.

    I'm more interested in the Man ;)

    Shalom mate

    Damien

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  15. Hi Mason:
    I was a sex maniac for twenty years [before HIV]. I have no regrets. I learned a lot. Be like a bee, spread your love to all the flowers. The world will be a better place for it.

    Good luck on your journey!!

    hugs

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  16. Je suis de tout coeur avec toi, Mason Wyler. Tes choix font ce que tu es aujourd'hui et je suis convaincu d'une chose : tu es quelqu'un de bien. J'espère que tu continueras de réagir de manière aussi saine.

    I'm not clever enough to say these sentences correctly in english. =p
    Don't spend your time, i'll summarise it in few words : i love you and admire you. :)

    Bien à vous (Truly yours),

    Steven, a Belgian <3

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  17. You've always been my favourite porn star for the couple of years I've been into porn. When I heard about your status I felt really sad and shocked for a few hours, then I though well what the fuck, he's not DEAD. You can still love a long and good life.

    By the way, I just saw your last tweet to Zach Sire and I'm having a problem loading your blog on the K-meleon browser (which is based on Firefox) but it works in Internet Explorer. With K-meleon, I get to the interstitial page, click "I understand and I wish to continue" and it just loads the interstitial again. Then if I try it again, it does it again. I've only had this problem for the last few days and I've been following your blog for a couple of years.

    I thought it might just be me but I thought I should mention it if Zach's having problems too.

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  18. Please don't go to Treasure Island. It will ruin you.

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  19. Come to Chicago, Mason.

    I'll set up a fuckparty with my other top buds and you as the main attraction.

    Topseedchicago on bbrt

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  20. Dear Mason,

    I watched you in some porn movies but I never got excited about you. You always loocked like a character that was overacting in some cold set. Today I came to your site for the first time. I have read most of your posts and I have to tell you that I was surprised for concluding that you are so hot. And it looks like that you can write and think, man. I wish that you could really exist and lived not so far away.

    Best

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  21. you're hot as all hell. nothing has changed. keep up the good work. :-)

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  22. That kinda sux. That's why you seemed to be kinda depressed when we met you in Starbucks in Ft Lauderdale this morning and on the beach later on... You have many friends to help you go over. Your Russian friends.

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  23. Mason, when I first read your admission to being HIV, I wrote this big old long comment. It started with "Nooooooooo" and ended with (((HUGS))).

    But, I deleted it. The reason is . . . sympathy isn't really that constructive, because it never really makes people feel better. And no one needs to be told that it sucks to have an illness. No one needs to tell you what you already know.

    So here's my new comment: YOU ARE HAWT AS ALL FUCKING HELL, and any guy would be LUCKY to have even five seconds with you. You are AWESOMELY HOT!

    I don't know what else I can say.

    Keep up the good work,

    nicholas

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  24. dear, you are an angel. beijos, rodrigo (csonakos@hotmail.com)

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  25. Mason, regarding your tweet that says:

    "If anyone is having a problem opening www.wylernation.com then try clearing all of browsing history, cache, and cookies."

    that has worked. Many thanks.

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  26. Dude, totally go with Treasure Island. So many of the guys they have a so skeezy it will be a great contrast to have a more mainstream porn star clean cut guy there showing all of those supposed "bad boys" how its done. Give Dawson and Christian a run for their money.

    Let your youth be served over there. And your hole mangled. I'd love to see a lot of ATM from you. Clean up a bunch of dicks covered in ass juice and cum. HOT!

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  27. I am sorry about your seroconversion, it sucks but it will be fine.

    On a much better note if you are ever in SF me and my husband would like to take you up on your offer. We are both tops, both uncut.

    Sounds good?
    Send me an email deuxlapin@gmail.com

    This too shall pass! Sending you good vibes!

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  28. Mason, you just go ahead and be as sexually deviant as you want to be (just do it carefully)! That's why we're all here!!

    Well, it's partly because of your honesty and candor, but yes, I think I really do love seeing that beautiful uncut cock plunging deep into virgin territory, and seeing it spit up loads of sticky creamy white goo when you're on the receiving end...

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  29. You are still hot as hell, and this aggressive top would still fuck your brains out. On camera, even. You seem to enjoy what you do more than most, and it shows.

    You'll be fine. Just keep doing the great things you do.

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  30. You are still hot as hell and one of my favorite porn stars. I'm an aggressive top, and I'd still fuck the hell out of you. On camera, even. You love what you do more than just about anyone, and it shows.

    Be safe, and keep doing what you do.

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  31. I just tested positive, and I've been reading a lot about you and the way people are reacting. I have to say that I'm shocked by their attitudes. I don't think I've found a single website where responses haven't included something to the effect of "he brought this on himself because he craves cum, so he totally deserves the worst of what I think this means for him". You have become a lightning rod for every anti-poz sentiment in the universe, and that has to be a heavy cross to carry. Every "safety queen" is screaming about your handful of bareback videos as surefire proof that it will never happen to them, and their self-deluding sanctimony is now so loud as to be deafening. You've smartly resisted the urge to try to shout over them with your account of what you did (or didn't). Instead, you're shutting them down with proof that life does go on after your test comes back positive. This can not be an easy thing to do, especially given how you must feel on the inside. You've displayed grace under fire and proven your gigantic balls aren't just porn special effects. You've got a decent head on your shoulders as well as in your pants, and I think you've displayed enough integrity and maturity to ditch the whole twink genre. Anyone who sees your face and thinks that you look like a boy is going to realize that you're a man. You're too good for the crap TIM pumps out, which seems to glorify the grotesque aspects of bareback sex and its most lurid consequences. Its porn for bugchasers, not real human beings who happen to like bareback. You've really entered a class of your own with your handling of this, and I think (re) starting your own porn operation is the best option.

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  32. Great to know you're doing well...all the best! :)

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  33. I still love you just the same JW. Come to San Francisco and marry me.

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  34. Dear Mason,

    Your are an intelligent guy : Now, you must have a good doctor, take medicines with regularity.

    And No bareback, of course ! Never.

    We want you in good health, sexy and happy ! No depression.

    In your mind, try the good vibrations !

    PEACE AND LOVE :) :) :)

    From Paris (France)

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  35. Mason, just read about your status in my local rag and found my way over here.

    I just wanted to share with you that I have been living with HIV since at least 1987. That was when I got tested. I may have been positive even longer, because back then, we didn't know much about the bug.

    I know that if I listened to everyone at the time, I would have been dead long before now, like so many of my friends. We lost most of my generation to this disease before the multiple combination protocols came out.

    What I know is that attitude makes ALL the difference. I didn't listen to the defeatists and pity-partiers then and I'm still rocking along here in 2010 and I enjoy life even more than ever.

    So don't let the negativity drag you down. You're a beautiful guy who obviously has a brain on his shoulders. As you get older, you'll see that is the sexiest part of who you are.

    And as far as I'm concerned, there is a lot about you that's just plain HAWT. So get out there, have fun, be safe, and get fucked!

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  36. Mason,

    I am continually inspired by you. You are still sexy as hell and I wish you nothing but the best.

    I care for you very much and if I can ever do anything for you, please let me know

    Bob F.

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  37. I agree with all those that have written something in the lines of, "you're hot as all hell, nothing has changed. keep up the good work", as you are, without question, one of the most beautiful men ever...

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  38. It's interesting to read about this from your perspective. I do not know how long you have known so cannot guage where you are on the journey. It took less time than I thought it would to notice the sun was still rising and setting and that I still liked the way dick and ass taste and feel. It was a revelation that goddamnit I still wanted to fuck and cum and kiss and rim and smell that sweet stink of fuck sweat.

    From there it was a short step to paying bills, morning routine with a handful of pills thrown in on the way to the door. Life resumed its comforting routines and usual ups and downs.

    After Queerty also broadcast your news, I have been fascinated to read all the clucking hens who are so certain of their moral righteousness and your turpitude. You are a young man with more clarity of your life than those fucking little twittering chick-a-dees will ever experience before they are old men filled with what-ifs and regrets. Fuck them and their dry ass mounts.

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  39. Hey man, I`m from Brazil, my name is thales (thalespamazonas@gmail.com is my e-mail) and I just read about what happened with you. I wanna say that u are fucking awesome, a very handsome guy, and I`m pretty sure that u will find your way. Of course we do mistakes, but that is where life begins and we have to learn with them. Hope GOd guide u, and please remmember that u always will have our support.

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  40. We love you Mason! When are coming to Chicago so we can fuck you and suck that delicious uncut cock?!

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  41. Keep doing what your doing...raw hot man to man! Don;t go to the sleezy part of porn!~u should top some and shaRE..TOO

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  42. Well what does one say, but that you risked it (a lot of times) and lost. One would hope that you have contacted all the partners you had since testing positive and told them so that they can get tested as well.

    Being HIV positive is not the end of the world, but perhaps you can turn your "fame" into something good so others can learn from your mistakes.

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  43. You inspired me to write a piece on my blog. I hope that you take a chance to read it.
    http://www.chasecoxxx.com/blog/2010/08/26/hiv-phobic-gay-men/

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  44. I'm really sorry to hear you're poz and I don't think it is the end of the your life, career or the world, but, it's not a good thing. I'm seriously disturbed by the MANY responses seeming to support the continued spread of HIV. You are hot. You are sexy, but that doesn't change the fact that you're carrying a deadly virus. Please don't be as delusional as your fans and take some responsibility for your past actions. Be safe. Don't spread it further. Don't mix it with other strains. Don't go to europe and infect ignorant twinks because they don't know any better. Step up to the plate and be a positive role model for the HIV Posiitive gay community. And the rest of you... get a fucking clue.

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  45. Love you Jason!
    Have never bought videos of you but will from now on.
    As a homeowner, who has had more than 25 gay tenants over the years I can only confirm, you come across some that do not deserve your trust and that requires drastic actions, which you took.
    In the long run honesty will always pay most dividend. I've never believed in living double lives; came out as gay man some 30 years ago and as being poz just after I found out 3 years ago.
    I also posted that on my weblog www.queerlog.nl/log and have some pages on being poz and barebacking, which I still do and prefer, but I do not stealth. Have gotten myself a biohaz tattoo.
    the poz pages start at www.queerlog.nl/poz

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  46. Dear Wyler.
    It is a comment place but I want to say just a few things to You: in short:
    I watched Your videos, You've become My favourite guy in videos (sea of cum of course from My side), I still feel this passion about sex that You have and I also have. And now there are some news about You as a human and just a normal guy not a porn star. I just want to say: No matter what will happend to You I will always admire You. Some of the bad news about You hurted Me, 'cos I know that You are of course a human being not only a body to f*ck. And maybe it is stupid but I care for You as for a friend, as for a great guy who love sex. I know that You had tons of letters and comemnts like this but this one is one more. I love Your mind, I love Your body and I wish You all that You want. Yours always (don't tell it to My boyfriend - I will tell Him ;) )
    Jack from Poland

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  47. i don't think you've learned anything from this. i really wouldn't be suprised if the next major headline with your name in it read "porn star infects unknowing partner". your a self indulgent brat and it must be nice having top notch medicine and doctors bought with your dirty money to extend your "sexually deviant" ways for years to come. do the world a favor and donate healthcare to the truly INNOCENT victims of this disease who were raped or born with it, who didn't have the luxury of a condom that you took for granted! i know you won't post this, or do and suprise me. the only reason i'm posting this anonymously is i don't have a blogger or google account BUT feel free to email me at hower87@yahoo.com with your rebuttle to my argument...i'm sure there will be one and i'm thoroughly interested to hear it

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  48. No, you can't get off of your "hospital bed / burning at the stake" Mason. Karma is a bitch, isn't it? You deserve what you got. No more, no less.

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  49. Thanks for being so open about it.... I am 26 and live in Houston too...i am bi and a party boy....and also tested positive this year....I know I always been safe and still don't know how I got it.... Anyways, I know this not end world....U you keep strong...and I will be still watching ur porn no matter u HIV pos or not....let's fuck this world around....

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  50. Wow, so much jealousy and hate in here....be strong and have fun....hot guy like you will definitely find happiness and love...

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